My Oh My!

Well it's been suggested to me since so many of my posts are about The Bell Jar, to check out this website called Book Drum. I'm already dying and reading into some of my favorite books. It's like someone put together a website to help explain and go further and deeper into the facts and tid bits of books, just for me. This is the type of stuff I love.

And now, I know what I'm gonna do with the rest of my morning :)

I can only dream of being as beautiful as this book/movie...

Yes. It's that time again. I'm almost done listening to The Virgin Suicides audio book. Next comes watching the movie. Then reading the hard copy. My obsession is crazy, but calming in a way. I just wish there was more to learn. Nothing is as beautiful as that book. And the movie does a darn good job. (with a few mistakes)

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close By Jonathan Safran Foer

Amazon Page

I just finished reading this Monday night, and again am blown away by Jonathan Safran Foer. (He wrote Everything is Illuminated, which I've posted about here before)

Just like Everything is Illuminated, this book can easily make me cray, laugh, reread, want to scream, breaks my heart, rebuilds it back up... all over and over again.

“I pointed her index fingers toward each other and slowly, very slowly, moved them in, the closer they got, the more slowly I moved them, and then, as they were about to touch, as they were only a dictionary page from touching, pressing on opposite sides of the word “love,” I stopped them, I stopped them and held them there. I don’t know what she thought, I don’t know what she understood, or what she wouldn’t allow herself to understand, I turned around and walked away from her, I didn’t look back, I won’t.”


“Humans are the only animal that blushes, laughs, has religion, wages war, and kisses with lips. So in a way, the more you kiss with lips, the more human you are.”

“Songs are as sad as the listener.”

These quotes almost make it seem like an all sad book. But it's truly beautiful. About an odd little boy on a mission after his father is killed in the Sept 11th attacks. I'll leave it at that.. Plus there is still a numbers puzzle in the book that I need to figure out... I love puzzles.

613 Kinds of Sadness

This was originally posted on Tuesday June 30th... And as I'm currently listening to this audio book... (again) and I know this part is coming up... I had to re post it... This book is so amazingly wonderful. (The movie is good too but the book is a trillion times better) And the audio book makes it even more interesting... Nothing like my commute home with the audio book playing to make me crack up with the people in other cars wondering what's wrong with me.

I get so sucked into books.. but this one... audio book format especially has me crying, laughing, repeating things out loud... rewinding and saying things with the narrator... i hate having to turn it off when i get to my destination.. i want to crawl into the story and see it, clearer then my mind paints it.. i want to live it.. the good and the bad.. I want to touch it... I want to be them. The only other book that captures me this much.. Is The Virgin Suicides...




From the book Everything is Illuminated by Jonathan Safran Foer. One of the most amazing books I've ever read. Also made into a movie starring Elijah Wood (though amazing, not as deep as the book.)

The 613 Kinds of Sadness by Brod D.

The following encyclopedia of sadness was found on the body of Brod D. The original 613 sadnesses, written in her diary, corresponded to the 613 commandments of our (not their) Torah. Shown below is what was salvageable after Brod was recovered. (Her diary’s wet pages printed the sadnesses onto her body. Only a small fraction [55] were legible. the other 558 sadnesses are lost forever, and it is hoped that, without knowing what they are, no one will have to experience them.) The diary from which they came was never found.

SADNESSES OF THE BODY: Mirror sadness; Sadness of [looking] like or unlike one's parent; Sadness of [looking] like or unlike one’s parent; Sadness of not knowing if your [body is] normal; Sadness of knowing your body is not normal; Sadness of knowing your body is normal; Beauty Sadness; Sadness of m[ak]eup; Sadness of physical pain; Pins-and-[needles sadness]; Sadness of clothes [sic]; Sadness of the quavering eyelid; Sadness of a missing rib; Noticeable sad[ness]; Sadness of going unnoticed; The sadness of having genitals that are not like those of your lover; The sadness of having genitals that are like those of your lover; Sadness of hands….

SADNESSES OF THE COVENANT: Sadness of God’s love; Sadness of God’s back [sic]; Favorite-child sadness; Sadness of b[ein]g sad in front of one’s God; Sadness of the opposite of belief [sic]; What if? sadness; Sadness of God alone in heaven; Sadness of a God who would need people to pray to Him….

SADNESSES OF THE INTELLECT: Sadness of being misunderstood [sic]; Humor sadness; Sadness of love wit[hou]t release; Sadne[ss of be]ing smart; Sadness of not knowing enough words to [express what you mean]; Sadness of having options; Sadness of wanting sadness; Sadness of confusion; Sadness of domes[tic]ated birds; Sadness of fini[shi]ng a book; Sadness of remembering; Sadness of forgetting; Anxiety sadness….

INTERPERSONAL SADNESSES: Sadness of being sad in front of one’s parent; Sa[dn]ess of false love; Sadness of love [sic]; Friendship sadness; Sadness of a bad convers[at]ion; Sadness of the could-have-been; Secret sadness...

SADNESSES OF SEX AND ART: Sadness of arousal being an unordinary physical state; Sadness of feeling the need to create beautiful things; Sadness of the anus; Sadness of eye contact during fellatio and cunnilingus; Kissing sadness; Sadness of moving too quickly; Sadness of not mo[vi]ng; Nude model sadness; Sadness of portraiture; Sadness of Pinchas T’s only notable paper, "To the Dust; From Man You Came and to Man You Shall Return," in which he argued it would be possible, in theory, for life and art to be reversed…

Cuz if you read it, it's true... right?

I obsess over books, stories... the idea of something solid... What does that even mean.. Solid. I'm on this never ending journey to find something solid, in a world full of liquid moments, and electrical shocks. Sudoku.. that's a solid. Judge all you want, but I pour myself into those silly number puzzles, cuz it's real. There is a certain way it must be finished, and nothing else will get you across the goal line. So I find a book that will suck me in... Where I can just zone out this world and enter another. Probably the best thing I know how to do. All of me. Ha. Me.

I love the way words look.. (sound is another story) I have The First Five by Henry Rollins with SO many page marks, of passages and lines, and quotes that I just NEED to make some art to. If not having the words on the painting.. but just being inspired by them...

The above pictures are collected from all over, fuck sources right now. I don't care.. but each has a different font, emotion, story to it... There is a connection to each one from all of me.

It's been about a month since the last time I really painted anything... and there is that feeling that I'm used to, from inside out. It's crawling up and out and I really need to get to work on something. I would really go back to being crazy with out art. heh. Best medication on the planet for someone like me. Or just me. Ha. Me.

Tiny Treasures...

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quotes from some of my favorite books...

I'm in a quote-y mood today... and a book-y mood as well.

• To the person in the bell jar, blank and stopped as a dead baby, the world itself is the bad dream. --Sylvia Plath The Bell Jar
• In the end, the tortures tearing the Libson girls pointed to a simple reasoned refusal to accept the world as it was handed down to them, so full of flaws. --Jeffrey Eugenides The Virgin Suicides
• The mind self-edits. The mind airbrushes. It's a different thing to be inside a body than outside. From outside, you can look, inspect, compare. From inside, there is no comparison. --Jeffrey Eugenides Middlesex
• I don't think that there are any limits to how excellent we could make life seem. --Jonathan Safran Foer Everything is Illuminated
• It's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace. --Chuck Palahniuk Diary
• Most men would never tell a girl her Pikachu smells like a crab cake. --Chelsea Handler Are you there god? It's me Chelsea

Can you feel it

Source - taken from The Virgin Suicides (book)
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I can never have too much..

Random Tumblr photos I've saved...

Summer Reading Bought Yesterday

(ordered it.. being shipped to my house!)




(again, ordered it and am waiting..these are printed to order.. how amazing!)




(finally grabbed this, i always wanted to read it.)




(just sorta stumbled upon this.. and it seemed interesting.. I love reading other people's diary's)




(recommended to me, and after looking through the pages at the store... I had to have it.. I'm addicted already)




(YES! even my mom wants to read this after me!)




(the book, not the movie, though i loved the movie.. mmm Shai)




(I loved the movie.. and why not?)




(I had to have this... I just adore her)

613 Kinds of Sadness

From the book Everything is Illuminated by Jonathan Safran Foer. One of the most amazing books I've ever read. Also made into a movie starring Elijah Wood (though amazing, not as deep as the book.)

The 613 Kinds of Sadness by Brod D.

The following encyclopedia of sadness was found on the body of Brod D. The original 613 sadnesses, written in her diary, corresponded to the 613 commandments of our (not their) Torah. Shown below is what was salvageable after Brod was recovered. (Her diary’s wet pages printed the sadnesses onto her body. Only a small fraction [55] were legible. the other 558 sadnesses are lost forever, and it is hoped that, without knowing what they are, no one will have to experience them.) The diary from which they came was never found.

SADNESSES OF THE BODY: Mirror sadness; Sadness of [looking] like or unlike one's parent; Sadness of [looking] like or unlike one’s parent; Sadness of not knowing if your [body is] normal; Sadness of knowing your body is not normal; Sadness of knowing your body is normal; Beauty Sadness; Sadness of m[ak]eup; Sadness of physical pain; Pins-and-[needles sadness]; Sadness of clothes [sic]; Sadness of the quavering eyelid; Sadness of a missing rib; Noticeable sad[ness]; Sadness of going unnoticed; The sadness of having genitals that are not like those of your lover; The sadness of having genitals that are like those of your lover; Sadness of hands….

SADNESSES OF THE COVENANT: Sadness of God’s love; Sadness of God’s back [sic]; Favorite-child sadness; Sadness of b[ein]g sad in front of one’s God; Sadness of the opposite of belief [sic]; What if? sadness; Sadness of God alone in heaven; Sadness of a God who would need people to pray to Him….

SADNESSES OF THE INTELLECT: Sadness of being misunderstood [sic]; Humor sadness; Sadness of love wit[hou]t release; Sadne[ss of be]ing smart; Sadness of not knowing enough words to [express what you mean]; Sadness of having options; Sadness of wanting sadness; Sadness of confusion; Sadness of domes[tic]ated birds; Sadness of fini[shi]ng a book; Sadness of remembering; Sadness of forgetting; Anxiety sadness….

INTERPERSONAL SADNESSES: Sadness of being sad in front of one’s parent; Sa[dn]ess of false love; Sadness of love [sic]; Friendship sadness; Sadness of a bad convers[at]ion; Sadness of the could-have-been; Secret sadness...

SADNESSES OF SEX AND ART: Sadness of arousal being an unordinary physical state; Sadness of feeling the need to create beautiful things; Sadness of the anus; Sadness of eye contact during fellatio and cunnilingus; Kissing sadness; Sadness of moving too quickly; Sadness of not mo[vi]ng; Nude model sadness; Sadness of portraiture; Sadness of Pinchas T’s only notable paper, "To the Dust; From Man You Came and to Man You Shall Return," in which he argued it would be possible, in theory, for life and art to be reversed…

A Blank Sketchbook is Just Dying to be Filled!

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I think I want a sketchbook. Nothing too big.. nothing too small.. but the perfect size to carry in my purse everywhere I go. And new pens... nice pens... But more then anything. I want a head full of ideas to be able to flow into this sketchbook. Sigh... A girl can dream!

Living a moment at a time...

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Good morning everyone! Here are just a few pretty things to start your day! It today is not as busy as yesterday... Maybe I can post some more! <3

Adorable, Just.... Adorable.

Yesterday I read that they may be making a movie based on the book Get Happy, The Life of Judy Garland, by Gerald Clarke. I had wanted to read this book for sometime, and instead of ordering a used copy online for super cheap and having it mailed to me.. I decided I just couldn't wait. I reserved a copy from Barnes and Noble and picked it up on the way home.

I think I love young Judy Garland more then older Judy Garland for many reasons. Her adorable nature, her "chubby" little body, and that VOICE! My goodness. The first chapter was very boring to me, I didn't really care to know about her grandparents and where they came from and what they did with their lives, and I did skim over a couple paragraphs here and there, just cuz I wanted to get to the good stuff. Now I'm sucked in! 90 pages later, I'm about to break into the chapter about The Wizard of Oz.. :)

Yes I may be reading many books right now. This one, 1984, a book about D.I.D. called Amongst Us, listening to the audio book of The Bell Jar (again), as well as working on re-reading all 3 scripts for my massive amount of theatre this Spring/Summer with Darkroom. :) I can't help it. When life gets to you, loose yourself into a book. Dare I say I rather read then paint? Well, maybe so, but books do inspire my art.




I love this video. She is just so believable and adorable. I wanna scoop her up in my arms. Yeah that sounds creepy.


Those eyes! Ugh, I totally had the hots for her in this movie. Again I sound creepy.

Book Covers

Some Girls Love Pretty Jewelry, I'll just take Pretty Books.

Now, you may or may not know that reading is one of my favorite things to do. Always has been, my book shelves are full, and I have extra books packed up in both my mother's attic, and my fathers basement. It's not fair that there could be so many books in the world that I want to read, and that I don't have the time to do it.

I can spend hours in a book store, and for a while a few years back, I would just hang out every night for 4 hours or so in Boarders waiting for Todd to get off work next door. The covers are usually what draws me in. I'll read the back of any book with an interesting cover. I fall in love with the images that are used to get a point across with one glance. Crazy obsession? Yes. But I can't help it. Here are a few of my favorites.


The Virgin Suicides. I couldn't actually find this cover at the store when I bought the book, which is sad, but the one I have is still beautiful.



The Bell Jar. I've seen tons of covers for this book in my day, but I held out buying it until I found this cover. I couldn't be happier.



Babyji. I can't remember if I bought this, or if a friend gave it to me. But it's amazing and the cover... is gorgeous.